Adventures in writing. Finding strength in mind and body. How to be weak. T-shirt cutting skills. The odd rant. The bottom of the darkest hole and ways to climb back out. Divorce. ADD as a superpower. Parenting as an exercise in floundering. Single motherhood. The little glowing bits that make everyday life worthwhile. How to rise.
My eyes traveled to the red light on the wall by the door. I’d seen enough about skydiving to know about it. My brain slowed when it turned green. The next thing I knew, a jumper just kind of tumbled out of the plane, gracefully and intentionally, but still. . . he was there, and then, OH MY GOD THAT GUY JUST FELL OUT OF A PLANE. Like it was nothing. Emily and I both shrieked. There was definitely more fear in my scream.
Read MoreIn the spring of 2019, I started making a list. When I talk about this list, people call it a bucket list, but that’s not exactly what it is. A bucket list is things you want to do before you die. My list is made up of things I’ve always wanted to do but never dared attempt because of fear. Some of it was fear of doing something scary, but most of it was fear of what others would think, or fear of push-back from others. Fear of striking out on my own and doing what I wanted because I clung so tightly to what I was “supposed” to be or do. Fear built on other people’s fears. I had strapped myself into a life focused on finding safety and not disrupting the status quo, around pleasing others at my own expense. This list flies in the face of those fears, whether they were justified or not.
Read MoreWe are creatures built of stories. They are what hold us together and what makes us fall apart. Our stories, when we share them with others, can weave us together into something shining and beautiful. What starting this blog has taught me, more than anything else, is that while we don’t all have the same experiences, we all have the same emotions. We’ve all been at the bottom of the well. And something that I think we need more than ever, especially when we’re at the bottom, is to know we’re not alone.
Read MoreWhere my writing for myself is a disorganized gush of words and emotions and memories, I’ve been surprised to find that writing for my blog taps into a deeper wisdom. It helps me organize and make sense of the myriad impressions swirling around in my head. When I’m done writing, I feel like a different person. It’s like the telling of the story shapes me as much as experiencing it did.
Read MoreIf you’ve never traveled alone, you should. It’s an intensely vulnerable experience. All the things you use to distract yourself from whatever it is you want to be distracted from, are gone.
Read MoreHere are a few of the world-changing, mindset-shifting things that have had a huge influence on me and that I highly recommend.
Read MoreHere’s how I cut this t-shirt! Want me to cut one for you? Let me know!
Read MoreThrough some of the more hellish months of my life, I couldn’t fall back on the one thing that had so reliably gotten me through hard times in the past: working out.
Read MoreThe morning of Finals, we walked up to the Circuit of the Americas before the sun rose, my heart thudding so hard it felt like it was shaking my entire body. I looked at the amazing athletes around me and all my progress of the past year vanished from my mind. I saw myself once again as the quiet girl who wasn’t really good enough.
Read MoreThat was when the magic of CG Games gained new light in my eyes. Everyone was out there supporting each other even as they competed against each other, genuinely wanting each person to feel successful. It brought us closer. It made me feel seen.
Read MoreI can’t write a blog about rising without talking about fitness.
Read MoreThis blog has been brewing in my head for many years, but I couldn’t decide what to write about. Finally, I decided it could be about everything. Specifically, everything that helps me rise.
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